107 Things About Me

1. I was born and raised in Michigan, and will probably live here until I retire and move somewhere warmer.  I would LOVE to move to a foreign country for a while (France, England, Denmark, Germany…), and it worries me to think that my neuroses will keep me in the US.  I’m very bad at stepping outside of my comfort zone.
2. I love my husband more than I ever realized I was capable of loving another human being.  And I love my dogs more than I ever realized I was capable of loving two animals.
3. I cannot even begin to imagine the love that parents must feel for their child(ren).  It has to be the most intense kind of love there is.
4. I’ve been married twice.  The first time I got married, I was entirely too young to be making such an important decision. People tried to tell me this, but I didn’t want to hear it. I should have listened.
5. My favorite recreational activity is napping.
6. I love being barefoot, which is funny considering I also love shoes.
7. I think that ice cream, pizza, sandwiches, and tacos are, perhaps, the world’s most perfect foods.
8. I choose comfort over style way more often than I should.
9. I’m a very tactile person. I love to touch things so that I can experience their texture.
10. I scored the same on the LSATs as I did on the bar exam: 157.  This score got me scholarships at the law school I attended, and means I ‘multi-stated out’ on the bar exam.  Not too bad, I suppose.
11. I consider myself an atheist, but if someone held a gun to my head and said I had to choose a religion, it would probably be Buddhism.
12. I survived ovarian cancer. At age 25.
13. I think grocery shopping is a lot of fun.
14. I have 4 tattoos. Two of them mean “love” and “justice.”
15. Chef school was my back-up plan if becoming a lawyer didn’t work out.  I often worry that I made the wrong choice for my long-term happiness.
16. I’m very sensitive to the way certain foods and drinks feel in my mouth, and there are a lot of things I won’t eat because of that.
17. I absolutely despise raisins.
18. I think poop and farts are hilarious and have no problem discussing them with others. Even at the dinner table.
19. Not surprisingly, very little grosses me out.
20. I’m deathly afraid of millipedes and centipedes.  Even the thought of them makes my skin crawl.
21. After undergrad, I thought I’d be a middle school English and Social Studies teacher for the rest of my life.  And then I realized that most middle school-aged children are the spawn of Satan.  And now I realize, I’m not really sure why I thought lawyers would be any better.
22. I was attacked once by a severely autistic girl named Jolie, who I was hired to provide special education services for. She punched me in the left cheekbone and threw a ceramic vase at my head.  It was neat.
23. Jolie also liked to get naked in public when she got nervous, which made taking her places very interesting at times. I once had to re-dress her in a Hallmark store.
24. I have more than $200,000 in student loan debt because I had to put myself through college and law school. My younger sister didn’t have to pay for any of her college education.
25. It took a number of sessions with my therapist before I stopped feeling bitter towards my parents about that.
26. My husband and I have 2 cats (Penelope and Smokey) and 2 dogs – a black lab named Otis and a chocolate lab named Hank.  They bring a lot of joy to our lives.
27. People always tell me they’re surprised that I’m a lawyer because I have a good sense of humor.
28. I want children, but the thought of screwing them up scares the living shit out of me.
29. I believe in karma, both good and bad.
30. I was cheated on by every serious boyfriend I had before the age of 25.
31. I love to travel but find it hard to poop in strange places, which makes for some loooonnng trips.
32. I was voted “Class Flirt” in high school. Also? “Prettiest Eyes.”
33. I’m still a flirt.
34. I’m very, very good at rollerskating.
35. I’m fascinated by William Shakespeare and spent an entire day wandering alone through Stratford, England, just so I could see where he was born, went to school, lived, and is buried. It was an overwhelming and spiritual experience for me.
36. I’ve heard the comment, “Don’t you wish you were as pretty and skinny as your sister?” more times than I care to count.
37. I don’t have very good self-esteem.
38. I suffer from severe motion sickness and often dread car rides.
39. I was once masturbated in front of by a homeless man in East Lansing. The thing I remember most about the experience is that his penis looked “ashy.” I think it needed lotion. Or, you know, to stay in his pants more often.
40. I don’t speak to my dad and step-mom because of the shady things they’ve done to my sister and me.  I miss them sometimes.
41. I think Dave Matthews is very talented.
42. I get along better with men than I do with women.
43. I find it hard to trust others.
44. I talk in my sleep. A lot. And sometimes fart in my sleep.
45. I love the way my husband’s bald head smells.
46. I’ve kissed a girl.
47. I was in an all-day gifted program called QUEST in 3rd, 4th, 5th, and 6th grades. Other kids in my school thought those of us in QUEST were “challenged” because we had dedicated classrooms in the same wing of the school as the special education students.
48. From 7th grade on, I was in accelerated or honors classes.
49. I’ve always secretly liked being smart, but have played dumb at times to get attention.
50. I don’t always understand myself.
51. I love rainy days.
52. I struggle sometimes with depression and anxiety.
53. I also suffer from migraines when I’m under-slept or the weather changes dramatically.
54. I love working for the government and hope that I never, ever have to practice law in a law firm setting.  Blech!
55. My favorite color is green.
56. I’ve been told I look like Sharon Stone, Monica Lewinsky, and Dana Plato.
57. I have a lot of freckles. And I love them.
58. I would choose bread over chocolate hands down. Especially Italian bread dipped in olive oil.
59. My sense of smell is uncanny.
60. Some of my favorite smells are new books, crayons, and Playdoh.
61. I don’t like to exercise.
62. I don’t like to sweat, either, unless nudity is involved.  And even then?  It better be a whole lot of fun for me to actually enjoy the sweating.
63. I drive too fast.
64. People tell me I’m photogenic. A photographer once explained that it’s because I have a very symmetrical face.
65. My family doesn’t “get” me. Never has, never will.
66. I will never, ever be a republican.
67. I love bacon.
68. And chocolate chip cookie dough.
69. And cake batter.
70. I would love a pet squirrel.  If I had one, I’d name him Noodles.
71. I don’t always feel comfortable around my mom and my sister because I feel like that they think I’m fat.
72. My idea of a good time never includes excessive drinking.  Alcohol has ruined the lives of too many people that I know and love.
73. I don’t remember my natural hair color because I haven’t seen it in a very long time.
74. I always want people to like me, and often spend way too much time obsessing that they don’t.
75. I drive a foreign car. And I don’t feel guilty about that.
76. I had acrylic nails for 12 years.  I miss their durability.
77. The summer I was studying for the bar exam, I fainted while walking down the sidewalk in front of my law school and injured both of my ankles (broke the right one, sprained the left). Needless to say, I took the bar exam on crutches. Without pain medication.  This doesn’t make me remarkable in any way – it’s just one indication of how stubborn I can be.
78. Narcotic medications make me barf.
79. I will do almost anything to avoid barfing. It’s not my favorite.
80. I’m not a fan of Christmas.  I hope this will change when we have children.
81. I love birthdays. Especially my own.
82. If something ever happened to my husband, I wouldn’t marry again unless the person I married was super mega wealthy.  I got married the first time for convenience and the second time for true love.  I figure, the third time, I’m going for the cash.  That probably makes me sound shallow, but I’m really just being practical (and honest).
83. I’m incredibly organized.
84. I have a tendency to feed and take in stray animals.
85. I love to color, paint, draw, mold clay, and do just about anything artsy and crafty.
86. I love soup. Especially tomato.
87. I’ve been to the following countries: Canada, Mexico, the Dominican Republic, France, and England.
88. I didn’t fly for the first time until I was 20.
89. Flying is another thing that’s not my favorite.
90. I absolutely love Razzleberry Pie (raspberry/blackberry), warm, with golden vanilla ice cream.
91. Shaving my legs is not a high priority in my life, much to the chagrin of my husband.
92. I enjoy being a step-parent a lot more than I thought I would. In fact, it’s something I’m pretty good at.
93. I love rearranging furniture.
94. I have a housekeeper.  If at all possible, I will have one for the rest of my life.  Cleaning sucks.
95. My family used to breed dogs when I was younger. Mostly hunting dogs (English and Gordon Setters). At one point, we had 10 adult dogs at our kennel.
96. I’ve scooped a lot of dog poop in my life. And cat litter, for that matter.
97. I miss my grandpa very much and believe that, if there is such a thing as a guardian angel? He’s mine.
98. I would love to get porcelain veneers.  And a breast reduction (complete with perky new implants in a D-cup).
99. Patience is a virtue, but it’s definitely not one of my virtues.
100. I’m hopelessly addicted to bad reality television (of the MTV variety).
101. I like hot drinks extra hot, and cold drinks with a lot of ice.
102. I’m afraid of clowns. And midgets.
103. I think I’d have an easier time killing another human being than I would killing an animal.
104. I don’t believe in regret.
105. Guilt is something I obviously believe in very strongly, because I feel it way more often than I should.
106. I’ve had a Franklin Day Planner since the 9th grade.
107. I love, love, love making lists.